What to Expect in Your First Counselling Session

Starting therapy can feel like a big step. Whether you’ve been thinking about it for a while or something recent has encouraged you to reach out, booking your first counselling session can bring up a mix of feelings. From curiosity, relief, uncertainty, even a little nervousness. All of these are completely normal.

If you’ve found yourself here, you might be wondering what actually happens in a first counselling session? This blog will walk you through what you can expect, so you feel more comfortable taking that next step towards support.

Taking the First Step Towards Counselling

Many women reach out for counselling during times of change, becoming a mother, navigating relationships, balancing career pressures, or simply wanting a space to explore their own sense of self.

The thought of sharing personal experiences with someone new can feel daunting. You might be asking yourself: What if I don’t know what to say? What if it feels awkward? These are such common concerns, and part of why understanding what to expect can make the process less overwhelming.

What Usually Happens in a First Counselling Session

Every counsellor has their own style, but there are some things you can typically expect in a first session. Think of it as a gentle introduction rather than a deep dive.

It’s a chance for you and your counsellor to start getting to know each other.

Welcoming

If you’re attending in person, you’ll be welcomed into a calm, confidential space. If it’s online, you’ll be guided through connecting in a way that feels private and supportive. The first few minutes are about settling in and helping you feel at ease.

Talking About What Brings You Here

Your counsellor may ask what prompted you to reach out. There’s no pressure to share everything all at once. You might choose to focus on one recent challenge, or you might not know where to start, and that’s perfectly okay. The session is your time, and you set the pace.

Exploring Goals and Hopes

Often, your counsellor will gently explore what you’d like from therapy. This doesn’t mean you need to have all the answers. Even if you’re unsure, your counsellor can help you uncover what feels important right now. It could be seeking clarity, finding ways to ease anxiety, or simply having a safe space to talk.

The Contracting Process in Counselling

Before your first session begins, you’ll be asked to sign a counselling contract. This isn’t meant to feel intimidating, it’s there to make sure everything is clear, transparent, and safe for you.

The contract is an important opportunity to go through the practical details together and ask any questions you may have. It usually covers things like:

• How long sessions will be and how often you’ll meet.

• Fees and payment details.

• Confidentiality, including its limits.

• Permission to take notes and how they will be stored securely.

• What to do if you need to reschedule or pause sessions.
  

Having this in place means you can feel informed and supported from the start. Once your session begins, you can focus fully on the deeper work of counselling, without uncertainty in the background.

Every Counsellor is Different

It’s also important to remember that counselling is not a one-size-fits-all process. Every counsellor brings their own personality, training, and approach to sessions. Just as no two people are the same, no two counsellors are either.

Finding a counsellor who feels like the right fit for you is just as important as beginning the process itself. Sometimes, you might feel comfortable straight away. Other times, it may take a little while to know if someone is the right match. Both experiences are completely normal.

Reaching Out Before You Book

If you feel unsure about diving into a first session, it’s okay to reach out and connect with a counsellor before you book. Many counsellors offer a short introductory call, which can give you a sense of their style and whether you feel at ease with them.

This step can make the whole process feel less overwhelming. It allows you to ask questions, talk through what you’re looking for, and see if the connection feels right before committing to ongoing sessions.

Different Approaches to Counselling

Another thing you may notice when exploring therapy is that counsellors often draw on different approaches. You don’t need to know the ins and outs of each, but sometimes understanding the general ideas can help you see what might resonate.

Some common approaches include:

Person-Centred Therapy

A supportive, non-directive approach where the focus is on your experiences, values, and inner resources.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)

Explores the relationship between thoughts, feelings, and behaviours, offering strategies to shift patterns that feel unhelpful.

Acceptance-Commitment Therapy (ACT)

Centred around meeting your thoughts and feelings with openness, rather than struggling against them.

Parts Work 

Acknowledges the different “parts” of yourself (such as the inner critic, the protector, or the nurturer), helping them work together with more harmony.

Somatic Approaches

Recognising the connection between body and mind, and using gentle awareness of physical sensations as part of the healing process.

Solution-Focused Therapy (SFT)

Focuses on identifying your strengths and resources, helping you set small, achievable goals to create positive change.

Narrative Therapy

Explores the stories you tell about your life, helping you reframe experiences in ways that empower you and align with your values.

Each counsellor may use one or more of these, weaving them together depending on your needs. What matters most is that the approach feels supportive and aligns with how you want to explore your experiences.

Common Feelings Before Your First Session

Feeling nervous before a first counselling session is incredibly normal. Many people worry they won’t know what to say or fear being judged. Others feel a mix of relief that they’ve reached out, alongside uncertainty about what might come up.

What’s important to know is that counselling is a non-judgemental space. Your counsellor isn’t there to give you a script or tell you what you “should” do. They’re there to walk alongside you, to listen, and to create a supportive space where you can explore whatever feels most relevant to you.

How Counselling Supports Your Wellbeing

Counselling isn’t about “fixing” you, because you’re not broken. It’s about supporting you in ways that help you feel more grounded, resourced, and connected to yourself.

Some of the ways counselling can support your wellbeing include:

Navigating life transitions 

Such as pregnancy, motherhood, relationship changes, or career shifts.

Exploring your sense of self 

Especially during times when your identity feels stretched or unclear.

Finding emotional support

Having a safe space to express feelings you may not feel comfortable sharing elsewhere.

Building self-compassion

Learning to treat yourself with the same kindness you show others.

Understanding patterns

Gently noticing habits, thoughts, or responses that no longer serve you, and exploring alternatives.

For many women, therapy becomes a space to pause and reflect in the midst of busy, demanding lives. It’s less about “managing” emotions and more about tending to them with care.

Counselling is About You

There is no right or wrong way to show up in counselling. You might talk a lot, or you might spend time reflecting quietly. You might feel emotional, or you might feel steady and contained. All of these experiences are welcome.

What matters most is that you feel safe and supported. Your counsellor’s role is not to direct or control the session, but to meet you where you are and walk alongside you at your pace.

Remember: the first session is just the beginning. It’s an opening, a chance to see how counselling feels for you, and whether it’s the kind of support you’d like to continue.

Ready to Begin?

If you’re curious about whether counselling is the right fit, you’re welcome to book a complimentary call. This gives you the chance to ask questions, get a sense of how I work, and see if it feels comfortable for you.

You deserve support that feels safe and aligned with who you are. Taking the first step is often the hardest part but it may also be the start of something deeply supportive for your wellbeing.